Yes, you read right, I wanted to get married and have a child at 18 let’s all laugh together.
I recently saw this video, I read the comments, and I was shocked to see people blame this girl for everything she did at 16; saying things like “you should have known what you were getting yourself into.” Apparently, we were all wise and very logical when we were teenagers.
To be old and wise, you first have be young and stupid
We’ve all been through some stupid decision-making phase; I’m no exception. I am one of those people who seem to have to all together. I often get compliments and praises, people telling me they admire me and all that. What they don’t know is half the time I don’t know what I’m doing, but I keep it together.
I started dating in my last year of high school, perhaps the worst time to be destructed by boys, but hey I was smitten. I also think I started dating because everyone around me was doing it.
He was my first boyfriend, and everything he said was music to my ears. I had my entire life figured and set up, and it all looked perfect and rosy. I was willing to do a lot of things for “love,” hell I even wanted to study at a particular university so I could be closer to him and do the course he chose for me.He was my ride or die, my soulmate, my world, and my everything. So, when he said he wanted a child, I considered it. It never occurred to me that I was 18 and a child was a tremendous responsibility.
The thought of living my happily ever after with this guy was a dream come true. Everyone in my life knew about him, and I used to post about him all the time on Facebook, every time I see those Facebook memories I want to puke…That relationship only lasted for about a year.
I’m 26 now, the age where most of my mates are getting into serious relationships, getting married, buying cars, houses and having children. I respect and admire them for that, but it’s not for me, not yet.
I’ve been single for almost four years. I’m at a pivotal point in my life where I have dreams and plans that are all about me, me and more me. I’m at the stage where the world is my oyster…literally! I can travel wherever my money takes me, I get to make decisions without consulting anybody, and I don’t have to compromise my plans for anyone (ok… maybe for my parents).
I lost myself at a very young age; I’m rediscovering myself and building my life how I want it. I’m at the age where being married and having children would be acceptable yet I feel very immature and scared even to entertain those thoughts.
It’s not that I don’t want a relationship or marriage, but I know I don’t want it now. Travel has shown me that the world has endless possibilities and endless opportunities, and I’ve only experienced a tiny part of it. It has made me realize just how blessed I am that relationship never worked out.
See, if I had gotten married and had that child, would I have been able to travel? No! Now other people will say “married people with kids travel all the time” but the truth is we come from different backgrounds and where I come from that would be seen as a waste of money and stupid.
If I had gotten married, I would have been so comfortable with the picket fence life and a job that, and the thought of packing my bags to go live across the planet would have never crossed my mind. I know this because I’ve seen it. Some of my friends who once had travel ambitions are now happy with their comfort, and it scares me.
I’m probably the way I am because I took life seriously too young. I wish I had traveled a lot when I was younger, but then I couldn’t afford it then.
I also believe things happen exactly how they are meant to be.